Long Day

Today felt like a long day. The usual rounds of monitoring and so forth were mostly all good news; BP still not where I'd like it to be though. Around mid-morning, the doctor popped in and announced that she's scheduling me for a c-section on May 15, then popped out again. I was slightly stunned, but also excited, and also disappointed, not sure what to feel really. I like to have a Plan. I like knowing what's going to happen next. Uncertainty makes me anxious. But at the same time, it did seem so final.

I called Terry; he had a lot of questions but the doc had already left to do other things.

After lunch Anita, Solana and I went out to the hospital gardens to relax in the dappled sunshine. Solana had fun running around the garden paths collecting dandelions for us while we talked and I let my hair dry in the sun. She declared herself a "baby tree climber" (some species of animal that eats leaves) and threw leaves into the little creek running through the garden. We colored and relaxed and watched ants collecting the crumbs from Solana's chips.

At about 4:00, Terry and I met with our doula to catch up on everything that's happened since my hospitalization. While we were talking, the doc came by again and was able to give us the whole run-down on their thinking, based on the measurements and monitoring they've been doing. Much better than just having me try to repeat all her explanations.

The bottom line is that there is still a gray area within which the cesarean might not happen: my BP would have to stay below 140/90 for a good long time, and the baby would have to decide to flip. The reason for scheduling the c-section is to reserve that time slot - it's easier to cancel one than it is to squeeze one in.

So, just taking it one day at a time. All that thinking though pretty much tired me out. And then I finally finished grading the current set of papers from the class I teach. Their re-writes are due next week; I told them that the original due date of May 13 still applies, but if they want to be certain that I grade them and not somebody else, then they need to get them in by May 9th. So it's a pretty short reprieve right now!